Sharing my experiences with God through my reflections on life
Friday, February 11, 2011
Why Can't Parenting be all Flowers and Lights
It is Friday! Yeah! The washing machine is running with a load of towels. The embroidery machine is cleaned and sewing a label for a hospital quilt. The dishwasher is waiting to be loaded. Shower taken - not yet. Things are humming along and I am thankful. It even looks like the weather may be getting better.
Though, somehow I feel a little down. I checked out a book at the library yesterday about young girls and their self-esteem, body image issues. It is very unsettling. I see some of the issues in my own daughters. How could this be? Did I project my own issues onto my daughters? Did I somehow discourage them from feeling proud and happy with the way they look? So many questions, and not so many answers.
I have had struggles in my life, but I try to let them go and move forward with a positive outlook and attitude. The truth is I do not like to dig deep into the issues to try to sort them out. Is God trying to tell me that I must look at the issues and sort them out? I mean, they are my kids, how can I just let it go? On the other hand, how do I really help?
The book suggests listening, encouraging, talking. I try to do these things already. I know I nag too much sometimes. I know I push too much somethimes. I know I let them eat what they want too often. It is such a fine line between being the parent and letting them grow up. I struggle so much with this.
I think it is time for me to grow up and face the music. I Corinthians 13:11 says "When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways."
I just spoke to one of my friends on the phone. I asked her to pray for my daughters and for me. She reminded me that I must believe. I must pray and I must believe that God will answer those prayers. I have to grow as a parent, but with God in the middle of it, I can become what he wants and do the work that needs to be done for my children.
No flowers and lights here. Prayer, faithfulness, belief. Acting when I am uncertain and afraid. Following God's lead. Being the adult.